An Image of Me
by Raven55
Summary: Do you really see who I am? Or something that you think I am? I’m not who I used to be, Ginny! I’m not that same schoolboy you had a crush on! I can’t be what you think I am, I can’t be just an image of what you think you need!”


**Disc: **I don't own the characters, or the places, or the bit of text from book 6, so please don't sue me. Oh, and the story was inspired by a song from Neon Genesis Evangelioncalled '' The Image of me"

**- An Image of Me**

The dust rose from the roughed-up ground. Everywhere she looked there were people fighting. She tried to find Harry amongst all the curses and moving bodies, but she couldn't see him anywhere.

A feeling of fear crept inside her heart. If she could just see him then she'd know he was alright. Although he had severed his ties with her as well as he had done, it hadn't changed the way she felt about him.

She ran on, dodging the coloured jets of light coming her way.

'Damn it.'

If he though that dumping her could stop her loving him than he had another thing coming. With pain in her heart she remembered the words he had spoken to her at the end of the summer.

_"Ginny, listen...I can't be involved with you anymore. We've got to stop seeing each other. We can't be together."_

He had sounded sorry to break up with her. The reasons he had portrayed were noble, not mean, and it meant that there was still hope for them.

_"Voldemort uses people his enemies are close to. He's already used you as bait once, and that was just because you were my bst friend's sister. Think how much danger you'll be in if we keep this up. He'll know, he'll find out. He'll try and get to me through you."_

Yes there still was hope for them. Once Voldemort was out of the way there would be room for them again.

"Don't be hurt..." She whispered. "Please be okay."

She bumped into someone and let out a small scream. Immediately she pulled out her wand and pointed it at him, then she realised it was Lupin.

"Professor!" she squeeked relieved. "Professort, did you see Harry? I'm worried."

Lupin nodded. "I saw him head towards the cemetery."

She nodded in thanks and made to run off after him. Lupin held her back.

"Ginny, wait!"

She looked back at him over her shoulder.

"...Be careful."

"I will."

Then Lupin let her go and watched as her red hair vanished in the crowd.

The further she ran, she noticed that it became less crowded around her. It was as if she had stepped outside of a crowded building onto an empty street. It was quiet and her feeling of fear grew more and more. She knew why Harry had gone this way on his own. He had gone to do his duty, what he had been 'Chosen' to do.

But she just couldn't understand that he wouldn't let anyone help him. Why was he so hell-bent on facing Voldemort alone?

The air got mistier and she could hardly see anything. Suddely she felt scared, not for him, but for herself. She was vulnerable out here. She suddenly didn't want to be alone anymore. Was it safe to call his name? It was so quiet...

"...Harry! Harry, are you there?" she looked around nervously. "Harry?"

Suddenly she heard the shuffle of feet on her left. She gasped, jumped to the side and pulled out her wand again. The figure held his head low and aimed no wand at her.

"Harry?"

His head rose. His face was covered in dust, dried-up blood and burn marks, but she had no trouble recognising him.

Her heavy heart lifted and she ran towards him. With a smile of happiness she threw her arms around his neck and burried her face in his torn shirt.

"Oh, thank Merlin you're okay! It's over now, isn't it? Please tell me it's over."

He patted her back awkwardly.

"...It's over." He answered.

No more fighting. No more.

She held him even tighter. "Harry, I was so worried...don't ever go off on your own again, okay? Never leave me behind..."

Suddenly he pushed her away. She looked at him surprised, not understanding why. He didn't look at her, but directed his look at his hands. They were also covered in blood and dust.

He felt a sickening feeling of guilt well up inside him. Never before had he felt so nauseated with himself.

"Harry?" she took a step forward and raised her hand to touch his face, but he pushed her hand away again.

"Don't." He said.

"...What? But...it's over now, isn't it? We can be together again."

He didn't answer and looked away. He had done his job now. Voldemort was dead. He had killed him.

Harry clenched his hands to fists. 'I...killed him. He's gone. I killed him.'

The blood on his hands seemd to burn through his skin.

"No. We can't."

He looked up at her just for a split-second and it was long enough to see the incomprehension in her eyes.

"We can never be together again." He said harshly.

Tears ran down her face. "Don't say that! Don't do this...You love me, don't you? And I love you! You said that we couldn't be together because of Voldemort, well he's gone now! Voldemort's gone and he's no danger to you or any of us anymore! So why!"

"Yes, he's gone. He won't hurt anyone anymore. But our chance is gone. And it's not coming back."

He turned around and began to walk away from her, away from the battle that raged on behind them. He shuddered as he saw again and again those last few moments he and Voldemort had stared at each other.

He wanted to get this blood off his hands He didn't want to see those images anymore.

The Prophecy had told him what to do. It was either the one or the other. He had killed. And now that Voldemort was gone, what was his purpose? He wasn't needed anymore. He wanted it to end, these thoughts, these feelings.

"Harry, you can't do this!" she shouted at him.

Suddenly he turned around. The blazing look in his eyes scared her. She had never seen him like this. She took a step back and turned her eyes to his shoes so she wouldn't have to look him in the eyes.

"Ginny, look at me!" he shouted at her. _"Look at me!"_

She lifted her head.

"What do you see now?"

"I don't understa-"

"Don't you? Of course you don't! I asked you what you see when you look at me. Do you really see who I am? Or something that you _think_ I am? I'm not who I used to be, Ginny! I'm not that same schoolboy you had a crush on! I can't be what you think I am, I can't be just an image of what you_ think_ you need!"

She felt her cheeks grow hot as tears rolled down from her eyes. Why was he like this? What had she done wrong...

"You say you love me, Ginny. But are you sure? Are you really? Because you can't love someone like me. I can't love you back. Do you want that?" he seemed to attack her with every word, but he couldn't hide the tears that burned in his eyes.

"But why can't you?" she cried. "You loved me before, didn't you? What changed! Tell me, so I can understand! I just want to be there for you."

"I can't be in a relationship with you, Ginny. I would only hurt you. You'd try and see me the way you always did, but I'm not the same anymore. I'm not the one you love anymore. I _killed_, Ginny. I murdered someone and I _planned _to do it. And you can't love a murderer."

For a moment she stopped breathing. Murdered? Killed? Of course, he meant Voldemort.

"Harry...killing Voldemort saved us all. You're a hero for doing so, not a murderer."

"You don't understand." He said bitterly. "I'm no better than him now. I killed him without hesitation, without even stopping to think about it. But I feel it now, I think about it now. I'm no better than he was. And now that he's gone, I don't have a purpose anymore. This was my goal, my one thing to do. I feel like I have nothing left now."

She laid a hand on his shoulder. "No one blames you, Harry. They're thankful. You have me left, us, all of us! We do need you. I need you!."

"No you don't. You love what I used to be. But that is just an image of me now, Ginny. He doesn't exist anymore."

He saw her look of hope and incomprehension.

Shaking his head, he continued to walk away from everything behind him. "Forget about it, Ginny."

She wanted to follow him, but couldn't find the strength to move her feet. She sank to her knees, cying.

"Harry, please!"

He didn't answer. And all she could do was watch him disappear in the mist.

_"Harry!"_

Suddenly she heard a loud bang. Stumbling to her feet she ran after him. She could see a body on the ground not too far ahead of her.

"Oh, Merlin no..."

She fell to her knees beside it and turned it face up. It was Voldemort, not Harry. He still looked scary now he was dead. Quickly she stood up and took a few steps away from him. Looking around, she saw Harry leaning against the grave of Tom Riddle senior. She sighed happily. Harry was still okay.

"Please come home, Harry. We all care about you."

He didn't turn to face her. "Go away...I can't come home now...it's too late..."

She stepped around him and gasped as she saw the gaping wound in his stommach.

"Why did you do this!" she wailed.

"How can you love someone who doens't love himself." He said dificultly. "You don't deserve caring for someone who won't pay you attention because he's too busy with his own thoughts. I have no purpose aymore. I did what everyone needed me to do, but now that I did it, I'm useless."

"You're not useless..."

"I'd feel like an empty shell, Ginny. I'd never have any peace. You might not care in the beginning. But it would only hurt you more and more in the end. Now go...I don't want you here when-"

He stopped himself. He caressed her cheek quickly and then turned away from her. He didn't want to see her tears anymore.

"Go."

He closed his eyes and waited till he had heard her hesitant footsteps fade away. He opened his eyes and looked at the sky as he sank to the ground. He leaned against the grave with his back and held his hands, now covered in fresh blood, to his stommach. The tears he had held back now flowed down his face and onto the ground.

"I'm sorry Ginny...so sorry..."

And as another tear fell down and touched the ground below, his body had gone limp.

**The End**


End file.
